Healing in my sleep

The other night – Sunday night – I hadn’t been feeling too good. Warning: Women’s Issue – I felt like I was going to possibly get an infection. Great. Hate those. My body, especially my reproductive system, is very sensitive to the foods I eat. So, for example, if I have too much caffeinated coffee or too much sugar (over a period of time) or too much simple carbs then my body gets imbalanced and may be on the verge of getting an infection. Generally, I know how to take care of this. I have to change my diet and kind of cleanse out with water or green teat. I typically take pills (daily) that help maintain bacterial homeostasis. In addition to that I give myself self healings.

Anyway, here is my point: While I was sleeping I felt a white energy move throughout my body, specifically filling my reproductive area up with its white energy intending to heal it. It felt like it was healing that area. It felt as though my cells and bodily fluids were being “crystallized” or “renewed/reinvented”. In my sleep I knew that I was going to be fine and my infection (or infection to be) was going to be out of my body by morning. I was not dreaming. This was not part of my dream for it was a sensation that I was feeling and knowing about while I was in a dream state – so I guess in a state of half awake half asleep.

When I awoke on Monday I was feeling all good all day. This was the first time that I was conscious of this happening and I wanted to make sure that I captured this in writing in case it occurs again. I think I may be becoming more sensitive to this, in part because I am learning more about our energy field and reiki energy. The energy that was healing me was Reiki energy. I just know it.

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Intuitive Notes

On Sunday while at my mother’s home I had a thought pop in my mind, it was my father. Next thought that popped was ‘wonder how long it’s been now since he’s been over here to visit with mom’. Next thought, ‘it’s prb time he drop by.’ Last thought ‘S’pose he will be moving to Texas soon.’.

Sure enough on Monday I call my mom and she tells me my father is over at her house and they are going to have breakfast.

This morning I ring my mother to wish her a good morning and she doesn’t pick up her phone. I can tell that she is on the other line. two pops of thoughts come up — She is on with my father … or she is on with the DMV. She calls me later in the day and she says that she was on the phone with my dad when I called.

July 25 :

Just one day or two before a scheduled telephone meeting with a work client I had a thought run past my mind at the end of the day. This happened either yesterday end of day or on Wednesday end of day. That thought was this: “Hmm, I haven’t ever missed a scheduled call with a client. That would be like a nightmare for me. I am so glad that I have never forgotten about one yet. What would I do if I did?” Today is Friday, and just about one hour ago I just realized my nightmare came true. I looked at my calendar and just realized that I had missed the scheduled call with the client that I had been reflecting on a day before. I missed the meeting! This has been happening more to me lately. So, I am logging this because I would say that I had a premonition. I had a feeling that I would miss this call. My thoughts either manifested themselves or they were a hint for me to pay more attention to the scheduled call time.

July 27 -

I thought I smelled Granny. I was at my Mother’s. Mom was in the kitchen cooking and I stepped out of the kitchen for a moment to do something in her living room. As I walked past the fireplace I smelled a very familiar scent in the air, but it was only in one area of the living room — the fireplace. When I passed the fireplace area the scent wasn’t there. The scent right away made me think of my Granny. I did a double take, sort of. So, I went back into the kitchen, walked back out and into the living room– took the same steps and again, the scent in front of the fire place area. Again, I had a feeling of my Granny being there. Feeling a little more sure I went into the kitchen to tell my mother. I told her to come into the living room and smell for herself … again I stepped out of the kitchen into the living room to direct my mother. But then it was gone. Granny’s scent had gone and my mom couldn’t witness it. Maybe next time.

October 2: Last night I pulled an angel card for my friend. I’ve been calling him Lucky # Seven lately since we recently found out that his Destiny Number is 7. This would be my first time pulling a card for him and the first time pulling a card for him long distance. Before I pulled any card the image of me pulling card #7 passed through. I then chuckled thinking ‘wouldn’t that be so neat.’ Sure enough I pulled the 7th card in a deck of 40 cards. I let out a big joyful laugh. Those angels sure have a sense of humor. They love to tickle us. I texted my friend the message … Encouragement.

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The July Full Moon

Saw Batman, the Dark Knight over the weekend. Excellent use of 2 hours and 30 minutes of my time. What about yours?

This past full moon (7/18) has really taken me through a ringer. Felt really spacey actually. Metaphorically and literally, my vision was blurred. Was dealing with discerning my emotions and trying to cut through illusions, in particular about my personal “love life”. Things are unfolding. I don’t think that I like how it is unfolding, but it is unfolding quite naturally; quite beautifully. it’s like a blossoming, sort of. But it is not supposed to like that with this person. I have another plan. My plan is with another person. Someone that I haven’t met yet.  This would be my partner for life. Though, here I am, feeling seemingly kindled. Isn’t that odd?

Some days after the full moon will help me to see more clearly.

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Kinda nervous

I’ve just sent out my first newsletter. I’ve been kind of nervous about it but I needed to stick with my send out deadline. I feel like I’ve put myself out there … eek! I hate doing that. I’d rather just stay under a rock. But, I have to get out from under a rock and put myself out there. I sure hope that it works. I need new clients. As a matter of fact, I just got a call from a potential one, but little does she know that I am only working part time as a therapist … I really need to remain courageous and confident. Hmmm better yet, calm, cool, and collected. There. I will remain calm, cool, and collected. I should add the other two C’s – confidant and courageous.

Calm, cool, collected and confidant and courageous.

Everything will be just fine. And I am intuitive. And I am being guided by my angels. Breathe. OOoookay … I have to believe that.  Scary. But calm, cool, collected, confident and courageous.

Now to work on the next marketing … a web site.

Hugs!

StarQueen.

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Picking up on thought vibration

Picking up vibes unconsciously –

My friend was thinking about the show Burn Notice and I began to sing the song, Secret Agent Man by P.F. Sloan out of nowhere. He asked me why would I be singing that song and I said I don’t know, why? He said well because I was just thinking of the show Burn Notice and it is a Spy type of show.

I was picking up vibes and I didn’t even realize it. He helped me to see that I was. It was so subconscious …. so I need to catch myself so that I can become aware and test out my vibes.

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My Spirit Friends

In this post I am defining who (spirit friends) I have heard from. My main reason for doing this is to be able to identify who is communicating with me. In the little research that I have done, it appears that spiritual teachers’ identifications of Spirit Guides varies. For a student, like me, this can be disappointing. I want clear cut definitions like in the dictionary, but I realize that since that is not going to happen I need to write down my own classification. It’s not too far out, though. None of the identifications from any of the teachers are really that different from eachother anyway. Mine aren’t that different, either. It’s kind of like in Aikido … there are lots of variations being taught and practiced all over the world, but you know what? It is still Aikido.

Here we go:

1) Angels – this includes Guardian Angels, too. So far, I can determine that it is them speaking by their tone of voice, and how they word things, and what they say. So far, their messages are often filled with love and support.

2) Helpers – this group includes my spirit guides. My helpers help me with just about everything — anything from finding a misplaced item to serious and difficult events or matters. They can feel like they are my deep inner gut.

3) Animal friends and familiars: this includes fairies. Basically, this group has more earth energy. They communicate more practically, more tangibly, if you will. They can be more obvious in a way, and that includes being more blunt about things opposed to the all love feel of the angels. This group can also include mythical type creatures, i.e. dragons, unicorns etcetera.

4) Master Friends – these are those friends of mine who are masters. This would be like Jesus, Mary, Saints, Buddha. In this group, I include the Holy Spirit. I think others may categorize the Holy Spirit in the 6th identification, but my reasons for this are mainly because I feel the Holy Spirit to be an embodiment of the 6th identification. Another reason for this is because the Holy Spirit was taught to me under the architecture of the religion I was born under. While I can render the Holy Spirit under other identifications, I feel it primarily comes from this one  — Masters.

5) My Soul I also refer to my soul as my higher self. My Soul is the spirit inside of my body. She chose my shell, my ego, my personality and my human experience. She is absolutely beautiful and I can only aspire to be just like her. I have recently met her. It is better to work with her as a team than to fight her will. She is stronger, but she does not push her will on me.  If I don’t listen to her than I will be sad and unhappy. When I do listen to her I feel joyous, filled with love and happiness. Go figure! Communication here can feel like your conscious.

6) Universe/God/Love/ Flow/ Ki – this is the great white spirit … the thing that cannot be named … the great abyss etcetera. It is the all knowing and the udoing, the creator, yin yang blah blah blah. Not as tangible. The closest thing I can say about how the  communication feels here is that it is a knowing or a sense that it encompasses all of the above.

7 ) Currently under construction : it feels as if there are times when I can receive messages from my friends from other people’s friends. The communication is specifically for other people, not for me. It feels as though this communication is meant specifically for another person and I can hear it. Right now, I cannot tell if the messages are all coming from my friends or other peoples’ friends who want to be heard and who are not being heard by the 3D person.

This list is in a very crude form. I am just writing it down so that I don’t forget it and to show what I can say about it at this point in time. I am also writing it down because I expect that I will be able to further add to it.

Note that I feel more comfortable with Spirit Friends. Yes, my friends are my guides. I don’t mind using Spirit Guides but to me, it feels more natural to say Spirit Friends. They all really feel like my friends. They just can’t be seen by others. I haven’t seen em in 3-D either, at least not yet. LOL.

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Gifts Received

Gifts that I have received from my angels in the past few days.

1) My lovely car passed its Smog Test

2) I received a great discount and a payment preference so that I could participate in a marketing workshop that the angels guided me to.

3) I received noification that there would be an upcoming marketing workshop the day after I asked my angels for help on my focus — really knowing how to identify my perfect client and identify the gifts that I have that will help them.

4) I felt immersed in love all evening yesterday (full moon).

5) I received another opportunity for a place to work.

So far those are the recent gifts that I have received. I have a feeling that I am missing some things though. I’ll try to continue to log.

June 20 –

6) the angels presented me with two gifts for my dogs — one was a Vet Clinic referral to a Veteranarian who is supposed to be extraordinary in his care for animals, the second was a carpeted stepping stool for my long backed friends who really do need steps to get on and off furniture. *My mother was just talking to me about getting something that could break their jumps on and off the bed and couch for the overall well being of each of them, particularly Talullah since she is a mini dacschund. These gifts were given to me by a nice woman named Julie; she is the wife of the man who owns the auto clinic I took my car to. This auto clinic was referred to me by my cousin who has long gone to him. Good peeps.

July 2 -

7) I won $100 in a contest at work, and although I had been shooting for it, I had really let go of the outcome. In fact, the day before the results I resolved that i had not won because it looked like someone else had beat my inquiry numbers. Ironically, the boss announced that there was a tie for the winner. It was my colleague (whom I thought would be the winner) and guess who else? ME?! Inside I thought, ‘how could that be? Strange.’ It was me! I was in the tie. I thought,’Wow’. I just knew that the Universe and my Helpers all had something to do with this. And then, the tie breaker …. I WON the tie braker! Incredible. This is real. This is all so real. THANK YOU, THANK YOu, THANK YOU. My helpers want to help me. They know that I can use the money. They heard me say that I had hoped to win this contest. I feel very connected and it will continue this way.

July 9 -

I bought some coffee beans for the office and the woman who helped me asked me if I wanted a cup of coffee on the house. I was surprised. That never has happened before when I buy coffee beans. It made me surprised and happy. The guy who rung me up gave me a real nice big smile. It made me feel real good.

On my walk up to the coffee shop, I met a dog. Nice handsome looking dog. His owner told me his name was Gadget. Gadget, nice name. Funny, because right when the owner told me that his name was Gadget I paused for a sec and went back in time to one Saturday morning that I woke up and started to sing the theme song for a cartoon that I grew up with — Inspector Gadget. It ‘s a far reach in this case, I think, but maybe it was a premonition of meeting Gadget. I don’t buy that all too well though. I think it’s more believable that I was singing Inspector Gadget and it was in my conscious somewhere and then I created a real Gadget … a dog.  Now that I think of it, Inspector gadget’s niece, Penny, had a dog — BRAIN! Hahaha, I wonder if Gadget’s (the dog I met) owner’s  name is Brian? If I ever run into him again, I’ll ask I guess.

I will write again with more gifts to write about.

July 15 –

I went to the coffee house and on my way out a more mature woman made eye contact with me and smiled. It made me feel special and lit something up inside of me.

July 31 — the company that I work for was acquired by a larger company. Why is this good? It is September 23 today and I can say that the reason this is a gift is because this is a catapult to a change that I have been feeling I needed to make for a good while now. So, thank you Universe!

October 3 — I opened up my email and there it was: FREE Hands On Cranio-Sacral Training Workshop. I timidly read the subject line and timidly opened the email. It was a legit offer. Whoa! Wow! YES! I manifested this. I manifested what I asked the Great Spirit for. I felt sort of beside myself excited and then at the same time I felt like – well, of course, this was to be expected, just a matter of divine timing.  And then I noticed that I felt somewhat nervous about feeling too excited about this because while the workshop is a real thing my mind then jumped to all these other details, like : am I actually going to learn anything? Okay, what am I getting myself into, really? This better be worth it. Ugh! Talk about ugly thoughts that really debunk the magic, eh? So I said, “Shshhhhh! Be quiet mind!” I manifested this and now it is up to me to take the next step; to grab a hold of this opportunity and just go! I asked for it. I registered for the event. I don’t have to think about anything now. I just need to be present. I did find out that I actually receive a CERTIFICATE for what I learn. I am really excited actually. I trust that the Universe, my Kami, has presented to me what I need at this divine time. This is love -ly. Thank you everyone; Thank you so very much for all of your unconditional love and support of me.

Background: Since February this year I have begun a monthly manifesting “program” on the energies of the New Moon. From April to May I asked to receive an opportunity to receive Cranial Sacral Training that would be sufficient enought that I would be able to provide it to my clients. I asked that it be no more than $200.00. In June I asked for the same thing except I asked that the training be free because I need this training to be free.

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Fighting Numb

Damn.

Damnit.

DAMN!

It’s beautiful out,

Sunny, Warm, Yellow Golden Light

I had so much fun in the past 4 days

FUN!

Joyful glorious FUN!

And now,

I am heading to get numb.

To numb out my senses

To stop the wonderful feeling of the flowing river

I had moving throughout my entire body

The fair world I lived in for four days,

it seems I must now surrender

My heart breaks; My soul saddens

My mind translates –

I’m going to quit my job; I need to quit this job.

I want to feel fun and joy!

I want to do things that make me feel so much goodness!

I will keep working until I pay off the debt,

then I will only have to pay for the roof over my head.

The Vast Universe will support me in that.

Anything to stop having to go numb.

I want to feel the freedom of breath

I want to feel alive!

When I awake to breath and open myself to be alive

It becomes undeniable that I am

hitting my head against a thick glass pane

that I just pretend and prefer not to see

And this redundant routine of mine

marks the beginning of my concession

to get numb and stay numb, at least while I am there

I can’t stay here.

I am

too magnificent; too great; too potent

that I must amend my agreement with Numb,

Break it! Actually.

Replacing it,

I get back to my senses

sensibility, sensitivity, sensation, sentience

Sentient

 

 

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Wolfe Right Now

As of about the last month, I would say, the image of Wolfe has been appearing to me more intently and frequently than other animals I’ve been seeing. Wolfe has my attention. So what about a wolfe? I found this link about wolfe and when I read it I immediately felt like this is right communication. Not only does it make sense to me, I feel it. http://www.animaltotem.com/wolf.html 

Specifically it states how Wolves represent the spirit of freedom, but they realize that having individual freedom requires having responsibilities. Talks about how wolf is a teacher and pathfinder, he comes when we need guidance in our lives. Right! And wolfe is a warrior and a protector. More importantly and specifically for me, Those who have a Wolf Totem will move on to teach others about sacredness and spirituality. I also really appreciate that wolfe can also teach how to balance the responsibility of family needs and not to lose one’s personal identity. That will mean a lot to me in the future. While I understand that now I know it will come up as a learning for  me in my future.  Lastly, this link shares -

“Wolf teaches us to develop strength and confidence in our decisions. He shows we will learn to trust our insights once we learn how to value our inner voice. This wisdom keeps us from inappropriate action. If wolf appears in your life examine where you need to develop more confidence and if you need more balance between friends, family, and yourself.” Lord knows I can always use more confidence …. and courage, and I strive for balance. My life is about trying to balance.

This is enough food for thought for me right now. I will be reading more about Wolfe because I have a feeling that I will be working closely with Wolfe. I’ll confirm that down the line.

 

 

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FUNDay

Looks like it’s been just about one month exactly since I last wrote. Guess it’s time. Hmm, a little synchronistic.

I am moved right now to write because I really want to remember this small but very significant memory. I took a day off from work and spent the day with a special friend of mine. Wow! I had so much fun! I had scheduled this day off in advance so my anticipation had been building it up. The 19th – a Scorpio Full Moon – finally arrived. We started our day early.

We didn’t do anything spectacular; we didn’t go anywhere far. We went somewhere that I hadn’t visited in a long while, and re-experiencing it felt so new. It felt like I actually traveled far away for just a day. I know that one thing I consciously did that day was to leave everything that I had been working on at home. I just left it; didn’t bring anything with me to remind me of it; didn’t try to squeeze any of it in my day off like I normally do. Nope, just said I am leaving it behind, just for today. Oh my god, what a relief! What a load off my shoulders. Though,at first, I felt the guilt trying to slip in. And then, I thought, ‘ya know, I am not going to let you come in today because I am having fun right now and I am going to ride this fun feeling out’. It worked!

The Ball and Starqueen had a day filled only with pleasurable things. We ate yummy food that we had also anticipated, including yummy dessert. We watched a movie — the perfect escape to anything, if you ask me. We went shopping at some delightful shops! Oh, it was just so pleasurable that it made it so much fun. Oh and we topped off the evening pretending to be pop stars on Sony’s Karaoke video game. Singing is so therapeutic … not everyone feels the same, I know. My mother calls it karaokrap and considers it to be therapukeish. Yeah, that’s because she just can’t sing, okay? Moving on.

Having this day made me realize the importance of truly having fun — where you set aside a time for just yourself or you and others to experience pure pleasure, acting on your whims and desires. No obligations are allowed. No. None. That is why we don’t get to have too many days like this, because life is one responsibility after another and while we can always have fun day in day out, that fun is combined with our responsibilities, the things we must do or should do. So “FUN DAY” shouldn’t have too many expectations and no-no-no obligations. Only whims, pleasures, desires.

Getting okay with some hedonism every once in awile is exactly what my day off taught me. Now, isn’t that just fantastic?!

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